And My Final Paper Is.......

Elevator Ghosts

I started working at my new company about 6 months ago. Before that I hated elevators. Now I work on the 6th floor and have no choice but to embrace the elevator.

I've learned to appreciate their quick method of transporting you from one level to another.

Especially when in my 3rd week here the elevators were down and I had to haul my ass up 6 flights of stairs, almost passing out multiple times along the way. (I think I may have already told that story though)

So, from the beginning I knew there were ghosts that occupied the elevators.

I've had many opportunities to secure evidence of the ghost's "marks" if you will, but have always been unable to.



First time: I was a little shocked and concerned and didn't think to grab the camera.


Second time: I tried to get out my camera but the door opened too soon and I had to get out.


Third time: went in prepared with camera, held up to shoot picture, door opened, unsuspecting guy walks in giving me the side-eye and looking like he wanted to retreat. I put the camera down.



Fourth time: I push floor six, maintenance guy pushes 4, I knew I would have time to do it so I got out my camera, I take it out....

....the door starts to open.....

right before walking out he grabs a rag out of his pocket and.....

............wipes away the evidence!!!!!!!


My plan was foiled!!!!!!!!


Fifth time: SUCCESS!

I present to you.....


The evidence:

I'm pretty sure I can be classified as a ghost hunter now.






BTW:


1. Don't be skeered of ghosts!
2. I did NOT plagiarize that photo!
3. Yes, I am procrastinating....again!

Procrastination is an Art

I have been slowly trying to grow up. AKA stop procrastinating.

I used to be SO bad. So so so bad about procrastinating.

I, like I'm sure many others like me, would wait to write a long paper, start and finish a project, complete your diorama* until the night before something was due in school.

So many nights I would spend an hour reading some book in bed, then reach over and turn out the light, snuggling into my soft pillows, close my eyes with a smile, happy as a clam.

Ah...sweet sweet slumber....


........


........


Then it came.

First came the quickened heart rate....

followed by the panic and adrenaline coursing through my veins!

OH SHIT!

FUCK'n EH!

That paper! (project, whatever!) When was that due!?!??!

I would ungracefully leap out of bed, usually causing some sort of terrible harm to a toe, or possibly my face (especially if tangled bedding was involved).

I would slam my fist into the light switch all while unzipping my book bag frantically.

Tearing through pages and notebooks and binders and sticky-notes.

AH HA! FOUND!

I can't even see straight I'm so horrified at what I might find!!!

Katy....focus...calm down I say, it doesn't help.

I breath, I focus, I find what I was looking for.

Just as I feared, of course I already knew what was there. Some huge, unmanageable project/book report/presentation/etc, due the very next day.

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck!

So anyway, the next several hours are a blur of tired eyes and furious writing/constructing/singing whatever.

And I finished it, normally at some ungodly hour, then passed out for my 1-2.5 hours of sleep I could squeeze in before my alarm clock went off.

As you know, I'm back in school to finish my last class, all my super anxiety causing procrastination techniques are back in full force!

I called my prof two weeks ago and said "hey! When should I turn my paper in!?" He goes..."like two weeks, does that work?" and then I'm all like "ya! sweet! see ya then!"

Fast forward to today, T- 1 or 2 days until paper due date. I have about 7 out of my required 15-20 pages done.

And.....technically I stole about 3 pages from my previous 20 page paper I wrote on a similar subject about 4 years ago.

Though I totally just Googled that shit and found out it is called self-plagiarism....

um....go fuck yourself.....?

I'm still using it, I'll just site myself. But then am I really considered a "scholarly source"...? I'm guessing...no. WTF that is probably one of the most ridiculous things I've ever heard. Academics are stupid. They just want you to have the worst most difficult possible time trying to get the fuck out of school.

I'm pretty sure the whole point of this post was about my procrastinating. I've been doing a good job at keeping myself busy writing this, when I obviously should be focusing on the remaining 7+ pages I need to write.

This is what I have so far:

Page 1: Title Page

Page 2: Abstract

Page 3-4: brief history of things

Page 5-7: Self-Plagiarism of Social Theory from my last paper (that I did not plagiarize in any way)

Page 8-14: Nothing

Page 15: Self-Plagiarism of a conclusion from my last paper (that I did not plagiarize in any way)

Page 16: Nothing and some MORE plagiarism, apparently









 
 *diorama - a box type thing that you stick mini things into to make it look like a mini version of a big thing.

example:

(Oh, and just so you know I'm not plagiarizing, I did steal this off the internet, there were a lot better ones, but this one stood out to me as extra artistic.)

BTW - Now I'm kinda paranoid about posting pictures of people's random shit I find. Am I going to get in trouble!? Maybe I should draw my own....? Eh that would take sooooo long though....I guess I'll risk it, or if it is really good I can site it...or maybe I should just put a disclaimer on the top of the site that says "I DO NO ART!" Eh....but then what about my pictures I take....hmmmm...way too complicated. 

I should really get back to work on my paper, or you know, do actual work.

167 Days

I just did the math.

It has been 167 days since I've had a period.

Technically it has been 93 days since the last D&C. And 74 days prior to that I had my last period before getting pregnant the 3rd time.

That is almost 6 months!!!!!!!!!

I feel like I should go to an MPA meeting or some shit. Kind of like AA only MPA for: Menstrual Periods Anonymous.

It would go like this:

Hi. My name is Katy.
I'm a Menstrual Period-aholic.
It has been 6 months since I last menstruated.


Then they would all chime in a dull monotone chorus:

Hiiiii Kaaaattttyyyy.

And I'd be all like:

Hi.


Just writing this reminds me of how much I hate the word: Menstruate, Menstrual, Menstruating, etc.

Such a gross word.

But I don't really get the word: Period, either.

I guess it is a no win situation.


Dear Body,


You know, I really feel like I shouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth (whatever that means...) in all seriousness though....what's your deal?


I mean I guess I can't really get pregnant now anyway, which means there is no real reason for you to shed your lining. 

Are you mad at me?


Honestly, you have no right to be mad. 

I should be mad at you. 

I have to carry tampons and panty-liners around with me everywhere now. I feel like you could just suddenly decide at any moment that blood must be shed. It's kinda creepy.


And, frankly, I keep getting all the other symptoms that you are about to do something rash. Like bloating, acne, murderousness, and other emotions. Eh...but I guess you are trying then, I'll give you some credit.


So I'll let you slide on the "menstruation" for now. I'd rather not go another 6 months though, how about 2 weeks?


Sounds like a fair compromise to me. 

And, hun, try not to make me bring this up with you again. I hate talking to you like a child.


Thanks.


-Katy


p.s. Also, I noticed that you keep supplying these cute little rashes inside my elbows. It's kinda gross and itchy, and my self medication didn't help it.

Can you please stop? 

mmmmkay....that'd be great....thanks.

I thought I'd include this awesome visual for you which really has minimal to do with what I was talking about.

Word of advice:

If your body looks like the diagram in image #1 I would seek medical attention.

Seriously.

My New Love: Canon EF 50mm (portrait lens)

I  think I forgot to mention that it was my birthday a couple weeks ago....oops.

(the big two nine btw! eeek!)

I think I also forgot to mention it was my Blog's birthday a few weeks ago!! Awwww she turned 2!



Anyway, this, my dears, is my new love, given to me by C, for my birthday.  (thanks!)

Linky, in case you want your own, so you can be as cool as me.

Unfortunately I haven't uploaded any of the fabulous test photos yet, but rest assured, they are magical.

With this little baby, I can take wedding style portrait shots that would make your mouth water!

(my obsession is borderline unhealthy?...agreed)

I'll upload some shots next week, so you can see the magical-fabulous-awesomeness for yourself! 

CaKe DaY....update

Without further adieu...

It looks a little melty there, but you get the idea....

Thanks to some lovely neighbor girls who saved my ass so much by sitting with me for hours making all those little fondant pieces!

CaKe DaY!!!!!!!!!!

Today I'm baking the cakes, tomorrow is the frosting and fondant accoutrements.


---- if you're confused, please see previous post  ----




I'm scared.




Hold me.






:: wraps arms around self rocking slowly back and forth...eyes glazed over in fear ::