5 weeks

So, I very much regret not blogging about my pregnancy with Greyson. I think that would have been really fun to look back on. I would like to try to make up for it by doing it this time.

It's interesting having a background of mainly miscarriages how even one successful pregnancy can't really offer much in the way of happiness/joy/hope.

I am trying to be super positive. I had a good feeling when I first found out about this one. As the days progress I start to feel more and more worried that something isn't right. I hate that feeling. I really want to be wrong.

My pregnancy with Grey started out very similar to my others. I found out when I was about 4 weeks. I had minimal symptoms.

Then something different happened.

At 5 weeks to the day I started feeling seriously nauseous. I had had moments of feeling queezy with other pregnancies but NOTHING like this. This was actually really fairly debilitating all day sickness. It didn't let up until at least 12 weeks maybe more like 13. I had a rough time of it, lost 5-10lbs, was on medication, it was pretty messed up. But every time I went to the doctor for my weekly check up she would ask me how I was feeling, I would tell her still sick all the time, and she would say "aww I'm sorry, but I like to hear that because, to me, it is a good sign of a healthy pregnancy!"

Disclaimer: I KNOW that not every pregnancy is accompanied by morning sickness. But for some reason that just made me feel better to hear.

Yesterday I hit 5 weeks with this pregnancy. As much as I really hated being so sick last time, I really REALLY wanted to wake up feeling super sick.

So masochistic.

But I didn't. I mean I've been feeling gaggy on and off for a good week or so. I've been pretty damn tired, and bloated for sure. But no sickness and no sore boobs. I can't help to compare this to pregnancies that have ended in miscarriage before. They were more similar to this.

I'm trying to keep myself busy and not dwell on this. Honestly, it does help to have Grey, he is a constant reminder that I did succeed, I have my baby, though I would love to have more children, if he is all I can have I will still be grateful.

In the meantime, I'm 5w1d, I'm pregnant today, and hopefully Monday I will have good news at the ultrasound.

5 Weeks

How far along: 5 weeks
Total weight gain: 0
Maternity clothes: n/a though the bloat is kinda yuck
Stretch marks: Just the remaining ones from Mr. Grey
Sleep:What I call morning insomnia - this has happened in previous pregnancies before. I am tired so I go to sleep early, then wake up at the crack of dawn and cannot go back to sleep. soooo tired....
Best moment of this week: Taking Father's Day photos for my gift for Sunday!
Miss anything: Wine, it's only been a few days, but I'm already missing another summer of no drinking... in a row! WTF?!
Movement: n/a
Food cravings: So far I haven't had my least favorite pregnancy symptom come up, the one where nothing in the whole wide world of food sounds good. I could do without that one (although it may be the reason I didn't gain much weight last pregnancy!)
Anything making you queasy or sick: driving, raw meat
Have you started to show yet: bloat doesn't count
Gender: n/a (my gut instinct says boy!)
Labor signs: um no, little early for that.
Belly button in or out: In for the time being, it never popped out last time, only became flat.
Wedding rings on or off: Off, I haven't worn it since half way through the last pregnancy
Happy or moody most of the time: I'm worried and happy at the same time!
Looking forward to: Celebrating Cam's first father's day on Sunday!