32 Weeks

How far along: 32 weeks - one day early but I'll be busy tomorrow so posting today instead
Total weight gain: I'm up to 205! I've NEVER seen anything over 200 on my scale!!!!! OMG
Stretch marks: nothing new, but the old ones are becoming much more pronounced
Sleep: vivid dreams, some insomnia, nightmares
Best moment of this week: We finally put up our tree and decorated it! Also had my sprinkle last Saturday, lots of fun!
Miss anything: still booze!!!!!!!!
Movement: Yep, all the time now! Getting strong kicks, especially when there is something on my belly.
Food cravings: coffee!
Symptoms: I think I hit a wall in the last week. I am having issues bending over, putting socks on, picking up stuff, etc. I'm SUPER tired, like not happy if I don't get 10 hours of sleep cranky tired. Which is pretty much impossible. I think because of the cold I'm not swelling much, so thank you cold! But I had to ask Cameron to pull off my rain boot the other day, so I think there is some swelling starting. I am having cramps on and off that I'm pretty sure are mild and inconsistant contractions.
Gender: Baby girl, Lorelei
Labor signs: nope, besides the random contraction/cramping. I'm very aware the time is growing near though. I'm planning on getting things done the next two weeks while I have some time off work for the holidays. I could be totally wrong but I'm really thinking she'll come very late January early Feb. So in my head it feels like I only have a month left!
Belly button in or out: In
Wedding rings on or off: Off
Happy or moody most of the time: Happy, getting nervous and stressed part of the time.
Looking forward to: Christmas Eve tomorrow and Christmas the day after! We are on super tight budget this year for Christmas because of my impending job loss, but Greyson has a bunch of fun gifts and I'm sure he will have fun trying to eat the boxes and rip the paper!

30 Weeks!

How far along: 30 weeks
Total weight gain: haven't checked for a while
Stretch marks: nothing new, but the old ones are becoming much more pronounced
Sleep: vivid dreams, some insomnia, nightmares
Best moment of this week: I found out on Monday that my contract is being extended until my due date, so I can relax a tiny bit that I'll be able to work until I can't anymore. And that means I won't have to be on unemployment!!
Miss anything: booze!!!!
Movement: Yep, all the time now! Getting strong kicks, especially when there is something on my belly.
Food cravings: coffee and oatmeal (brown sugar and apple cinnamon) - same!
Symptoms: Skin is continuing to look better. Pelvis pain actually starting to taper off. Not perfect, but I'm not wincing in pain everytime I move. Today I've been super crampy. Not ready to go yet, but subtle reminders that I'm getting very close to the end here. If I have her as early as Greyson, I'm looking at 7 weeks left!!
Gender: Baby girl, Lorelei
Labor signs: nope, just crampies occasionally, probably growing baby/belly.
Belly button in or out: In
Wedding rings on or off: Off as of this morning, more because I was paranoid that it would get stuck
Happy or moody most of the time: Happy, getting nervous and stressed part of the time.
Looking forward to: My Christmas Tree Hunting Party/baby sprinkle is coming up this weekend! I was not looking forward to it earlier but now I'm excited to get a tree and see everyone

 

 

And a bump pic!

Losing Your Job While Pregnant

I thought I would write a little about how I'm feeling about facing impending joblessness while pregnant.

Last February I decided to leave my full time regular position at a well known company to work a one year contract job at a different company. There were a few reasons for this:

1. It was a step up financially
2. The job I left was in a big transition and I didn't feel secure
3. It gave me the opportunity to add to my resume and learn a new area of my line of work

Cameron agreed with my reasons and we decided it was ok to take the risk.

My new boss seemed to like me a lot, we got along great, he had zero complaints. I was very gung-ho and learned my job fast and well. I even volunteered for additional projects and work.

Several months into this new job I found out I was pregnant again (we were trying, and assumed it would take years to conceive again...wrong) 

Then my boss decided to leave the company. Within a couple of weeks of finding out I was pregnant. This was a huge blow and instantly I knew I was out on a limb, and could only hope that I made a great impression on whomever his replacement ended up being.

The new replacement arrived about a month after his departure. I did everything I could to make a great impression. I hid my pregnancy as long as possible. I volunteered for projects, really tried to show my value.

At around 18 weeks I really couldn't hide it well anymore and had decided to tell my new manager at our next one on one meeting. She had been here about a month or so. Right before I was going to tell her she told me that she decided to discontinue my contract role in November, because she wanted to find someone who was more senior to fill the role. I felt like I got punched in the face. I doubt I hid my complete and utter disappointment very well.

I was crushed.

I followed up by letting her know I was pregnant as an FYI, since it obviously didn't matter since I wouldn't even be here the extent of the pregnancy.

I had started to apply for new jobs as soon as my old boss left, which was August. The larger my belly got the more I knew I would be out of luck on finding a new job. I had at least 12 interviews, not a one panned out. Normally I have been lucky with finding jobs and was getting stressed out at not finding anything.

It is now 3 months after my boss screwed me over and I just started training my replacement. I'm very bitter and trying hard not to let it show to her or my other coworkers. After all, I did take this risk voluntarily knowing it might not have worked out. We DID start trying to for a baby fulling knowing I COULD have gotten pregnant.

For some reason I'm still pissed. It all just seems like such BS. I know I did an excellent job and should have been kept on. I hate my new boss (even before she told me about my contract ending). I don't even like the company that much. But I'm pissed in principal.

Stealing my livelihood. Throwing me to the wolves when I'm pregnant and cannot find something else. Screwing up our savings plan, our move plans, all of our plans. Especially when adding another mouth to feed.

I'm just plain pissed.

And probably slightly more hormonal than normal.

I have gone to her manager and basically begged to be kept on a few extra weeks (to avoid unemployment and jump straight into disability pay). I should find out next week if they are willing to do that.

So that is that. I'm nervous about the next few months and how we are going to get by. I've done the math and think we will be fine, cutting it close for a couple of months. I am also really concerned how this will impact my relationship with the new baby. Am I going to be spending too much time away from her interviewing and applying for jobs? How is this going to impact my breastfeeding? Is the stress going to be seriously high?

Ugh, a lot to think about on top of the probably more common job loss feelings: rejection, embarrassment, low self worth, impending doom, etc.

Hopefully I will  be able to keep up the blog and don't spiral into a state of depression...

I feel that I should end this on a positive note by listing reasons why this might be a good thing:

1. This will give me the opportunity to get into a better company/position
2. I might land a job that is transferable up to PNW, making our move eaiser
3. I will have extra time to spend with the kiddos
4. I might get more projects done
5. I will have time to keep up with the house stuff

29 Weeks

How far along: 29 weeks
Total weight gain: 23 lbs, haven't checked since last time
Stretch marks: nothing new, but the old ones are becoming much more pronounced
Sleep: vivid dreams, some insomnia, nightmares
Best moment of this week: Thanksgiving was last week, had a great time, tried making yeast bread for the first time, turned out awesome!
Miss anything: booze!
Movement: Yep, all the time now!
Food cravings: coffee and oatmeal (brown sugar and apple cinnamon) - same!
Symptoms: Skin is continuing to look better. Pelvis pain continues, getting worse. I'm having this super fun pain on the right side of my inner thigh, groin area I guess, this is getting worse too. Gender: Baby girl, Lorelei
Labor signs: not labor, but I have gotten braxton hicks and some cramping that feels like early stage contractions a few times. Nothing consistent though, not enough to be concerning.
Belly button in or out: In
Wedding rings on or off: On - but I should probably take it off soon before I can't anymore
Happy or moody most of the time: My work situation is the same. I've requested they keep me on for an additional few weeks to bring me to my maternity leave time. I should have an update next week. Fingers crossed! Otherwise my last day here will be in a few weeks.
Looking forward to: My Christmas Tree Hunting Party/baby sprinkle is coming up in a couple weeks. This is our third year doing it I think, and I have very few things for new baby, so that will be super helpful for us.

27 Weeks!

How far along: 27 weeks
Total weight gain: 23 lbs, oh my that sounds like a lot
Maternity clothes: yes
Stretch marks: nothing new, but the old ones are becoming much more pronounced
Sleep: vivid dreams, some insomnia
Best moment of this week: Rough weekend actually, not a whole lot of good to report. We had Cameron's uncles memorial over the weekend, very sad.
Miss anything: Nothing really this week
Movement: Yep, all the time now!
Food cravings: coffee and oatmeal (brown sugar and apple cinnamon) - same!
Symptoms: Skin is continuing to look better. Pelvis pain continues, but not too bad. I'm having this super fun pain on the right side of my inner thigh, groin area I guess? Kind of feels like my leg is being slowly pulled away from the rest of my body. Not awesome actually.
Gender: Baby girl, Lorelei
Labor signs: no
Belly button in or out: In
Wedding rings on or off: On
Happy or moody most of the time: Getting a little nervous about my work situation, my contract is set to end on 12/23 and then I'm facing unemployment until after I can start looking for a job when the baby comes. I'm nervous about how that is going to impact us financially and not feeling great about adding this burden.
Looking forward to: Thanksgiving is 1 week from today! It is going to be small, not the normal fancy beach gathering, but I'm sure it will still be lovely!

These pictures are funny, I'm feeling QUITE a bit larger than these portray!

26 Weeks

How far along: 26 weeks
Total weight gain: a lot
Maternity clothes: yep, some non-maternity shirts are fine though
Stretch marks: nothing new
Sleep: vivid dreams, some insomnia
Best moment of this week: Wonderful weekend in Portland!
Miss anything: Drinking. I missed drinking this week.
Movement: Yep, all the time now!
Food cravings: coffee and oatmeal (brown sugar and apple cinnamon) - same!
Symptoms: Skin is looking a tiny bit better. Oh and my pelvis pain started in the past few days, which is sad. My pregnancy with Greyson it was almost unbearable pain for several weeks. I really hope it isn't as bad this time.
Gender: Baby girl, Lorelei
Labor signs: no
Belly button in or out: In
Wedding rings on or off: On
Happy or moody most of the time: Happy, getting a little stressed out now
Looking forward to: Thanksgiving is in 2 weeks, I have all kinds of fun new stuff to try making :)

In other news I finally broke down and got a "mom" haircut. Honestly my hair was falling out in a bad way, obviously the chemistry of my hair changed during this pregnancy. It was dry, breaking, tangly, just kind of awful. It is SO much better now, I do not regret it!

Also I thought since this is my last post in the 2nd Trimester, that I would add my bump photos!

Portland - the land of trees and beer

This last weekend was Cameron's birthday, I tired to surprise him with a trip to Portland. I was able to keep it a surprise for a few months, but needed to tell him a few weeks before his birthday for planning purposes. It was awesome anyway!

Cameron and I have been planning on moving up to the pacific northwest for a while now. We are waiting on a few things, property value increase here, job stuff, etc. But we are totally ready to get out of this desert hot hell hole of California.

So I thought it would be fun to take a quick trip up north so Cameron could see what its like in the fall (I've lived outside of Portland so I know it is wonderful!)

It was also Greyson's first flight! The way there was pretty uneventful, he was a little whinny but not the nightmarish scene I was worried about. He even fell asleep for about 20 minutes!

We rented a house through Air BnB in Northeast Portland. The house was a super cute craftsman style, 4 bedroom, spacious downstairs. We went on the trip with another couple and their 15 month old, so we had plenty of room to spread out.

I tired to find interesting places to eat and visit while we were there, some of the places I remember loving when I lived there, and some new. The first night we went out to the Rhinelander restaurant and had some seriously amazing chicken schnitzel and lentil soup, just as great as I remember! And apparently Greyson loves lentil soup too.

The next morning we went to a breakfast joint that a few people had recommended to me, the Waffle Window. I mean shit, how can you go wrong with that!?  Nope couldn't go wrong! It was freaking fantastic, I had a savory waffle, which was covered in ham and Gruyere cheese, very sweet, so good, you didn't need much more than that. Very much like street truck food only in a permanent location.

The rest of the day was spent driving around looking at different neighborhoods around town to see which areas we could picture living in. There were several that were seriously so gorgeous. I haven't been to Oregon in the fall in such a long time I'd completely forgotten they get real seasons there. The leaves were beautiful, I really couldn't get enough of them. Didn't take many photos of our neighborhood adventures, but we did hit up one of my all time favorite restaurants while we were out: Cornelius Pass Roadhouse one of the McMenamins. The first time I went here I was only 9 years old. It was even better than the last time!

Of course we checked out a few parks, Greyson's first time in a swing, loved it!

Saturday I spent most of the day with some friends in the area, we went out to another awesome brewery called HUB, Hopworks Urban Brewery. Very kid friendly which was great because we had several with us! We also went and walked around another McMenamins - Kennedy School, which I hadn't been to before. Totally loved it, of course!

Saturday night was Cameron's "big" birthday dinner. I invited all of his family from the area and some of my friends that live in or around Portland.  The place was called the Oregon Public House, cool not for profit brewery with awesome food.

Sunday was our last day in Portland, and we still managed to make the most of it. We started out with breakfast at another recommended location, Pine State Biscuits.  And O M G, I couldn't have imagined that my Waffle Window could be outdone, but yes.... it was....

I'm not sure I've ever had a better breakfast in my life. Obviously, given the name, primarily the food is biscuit related. I had biscuits and gravy, others had breakfast sandwiches with biscuits, or even a shrimp and grits plate. Seriously just freaking amazing (and I swear it isn't because I'm pregnant! Everyone loved theirs!)

We then drove around some more neighborhoods, that, shocker, even out did the ones from earlier in the trip. Overwhelmingly awesome! The TREES!!!! The RAIN!! I JUST CANT.

Then yet ANOTHER fucking amazing restaurant, how can this be!?! This one we just drove by and said, hey that looks good, let's stop. It was called Tabor Tavern. Totally kid friendly funky modern little tavern. Great food, great mood, great company. It was the icing on the cake of the trip. Just felt so right to be there, I've only been home a day and a half and miss it dearly.

 The flight home was pretty awful. It would have been better to take a morning flight. Greyson pretty much threw a shit fit from take off to landing. And we got home well past bedtime, around 8 or 8:30.

I'm going to overlook that as poor planning on my part, and am looking forward to our next trip (which will also include new baby girl) to Seattle in the summer to check out our other prospective neighborhoods!