Over the weekend I started spotting a lot of brown. I hadn't spotted at all so far, so this was very concerning. It just so happened that during the last pregnancy, the baby stopped growing at around 9 weeks. Right about now. This mixed with the spotting = scary.
I called the doc yesterday morning to let them know that I was spotting and had just started cramping. Luckily they had me come in for an ultrasound.
Oh. I can't even explain how hard it was to wait those 4 hours from when I spoke to the nurse and when the appointment was scheduled.
Agony.
C came with me, we met at home and drove to the office. Our drive consisted of talking about what happens when we find out the bad news and what to do next, and even silver linings of trying again.
It sounds negative, but anyone who has experienced a loss probably knows how it actually feels better to prep for bad news instead of pretending it will be good news. Or maybe that is just how we decided to treat it.
FINALLY we were let into the room by the tech who read my chart. She left, and a minute later the actual doctor came in and said he'd be doing it. I'm guessing it was because of my previous loss.
Doctor said he wanted to look at the images for a minute before he said anything. Luckily it was less than that and he said "look I see a heartbeat. Everything is fine."
WOW I was actually in shock, how could it be fine. I really thought it wouldn't be fine. I think C felt the same way, he was like "really?" sounding skeptical.
Then he zoomed in and we could see, a baby bigger than last time and a strong looking heartbeat.
Nice. We feel better. Not 100% but better. But better.
There was definitely fresh blood after that. And I continue to spot new and old blood. I'm trying not to worry about it. The doctor told us he, just simply, didn't know what the cause was. He did say the cervix was closed, so really I'm not super worried. It seems like the bleeding is coming from something on the outside of the uterus, and not the inside.
Relief. I, possibly, might be more pregnant than I have ever been. I'll breath easier at our next scheduled ultrasound, two weeks from today. I should be 11 weeks exactly.
Here is what baby is looking like today. Too bad I forgot to ask for a picture yesterday, otherwise I could show you what it actually looked like. Honestly I couldn't keep my eyes off that heartbeat, so I don't even remember what the body was looking like. I'll assume it looked like the image below (not the green olive) :)
![](http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-fkVdRN6Fbe0/TcAzTLea75I/AAAAAAAAAhs/sXRAG6yxc4I/s320/9weekbaby.png)
![](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-yOAZtQ_ijYI/TcAzf9ZSKPI/AAAAAAAAAh0/UJ6UmQzIixk/s320/Olive.png)
So happy everything is ok! Such a scary feeling to be spotting & cramping!
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